Wait, have we mentioned we have a book coming out soon?

Here’s a teaser from chapter 4 (Home Remedies to Get You Out of Recession Depression), all about updating your home on a shoestring. We’ll give you the lowdown on what to toss, how to re-purpose, where to buy, and when to splurge.

On linens:

Bitch, you spend more time in the bed and bath than anywhere else. Outside of your toothbrush, which objects gets more up close and personal? Do you need reminding of a few basic facts? OK, here goes. Things suck. Life is short, wars rage, money’s tight, jobs are sparse. These days, the only legitimate way to pamper yourself is with everyday objects—the things you use constantly. The things that know your skin and curves better than any man ever could…

On the Mid-Century Modern Craze:

Mid-century modern became hot by skipping a generation. No one wanted the old furniture from those 50’s ranch houses, so it was cheap, cheap, cheap. All the very cool hipster, creative types who couldn’t afford pricy antiques bought it because they could afford it…. Be a contrarian and think of the rush to modern as your opportunity to get back in touch (a little) with the frippery and finery of another era. A bitch is nothing if not in touch with her paradoxes…

On Mirrors:

Think Grandma’s place in Miami: the walls of mirror, the gold furnishings, the plastic cover on the sofa…. We can go without the plastic, but those mirrors? Love ‘em. They’re a perfect, simple, and cheap way to enhance any room. We’re not talking Poconos ceiling mirrors (although we like your thinking) but well-placed, space-enhancing, light-reflecting mirrors…

Bitches on a Budget is being published by the New American Library division of Penguin Books. Ask your bookseller when they will be putting it on their shelves.