It’s mid-September and everyone is back at school and you’re not.

You know that feeling when summer ends and the leaves begin to fall and you feel like your life should change.  You always wondered why those romantic poets used spring as their metaphor for new beginnings.  Surely it was fall with the advent of the new school year that you felt the stirring of a fresh start (heads out of the gutter girls –it’s a different kind of stirring than you felt for that cute guy in Chem. I).

Yes you were so happy in the spring to be done with finals. You never wanted to pull another all nighter. No nasty administrators to foul up your schedule or unfair teachers forcing you to grade haggle. Ten o’clock classes three mornings a week intruding on your beauty sleep –finished. Yes, blissful summer freedom beckoned. So what if you were bagging groceries at minimum wage or working at the local summer camp as the designated archery specialist (despite your inability to lift the crossbow to your shoulder). You knew it would end.  When the air crisped and the apples ripened that first day back at school was a red-letter day.

And now that you’re all grown up, the end of summer doesn’t signal much except the same monotonous tough workweek. No cute new boys in class to fantasize about and no fresh new clothes on your mom’s nickel.  Face it, that morning Expos Writing class is looking pretty damned fine.

How’s a clever bitch to replicate that back to school feeling ?

When was the last time you went to your local library? Was it the time you returned long overdue books? Okay we share your pain.  We too remember the librarian with half readers staked midway on her nose, held in place by ancient black croakies repaired at the hook end with duct tape. With obvious scorn she looked back at us as we made a weak excuse for the tardy return of our borrowed books. Slowly and deliberately she opened and scanned each and every volume. A little bleep sounded with each pass, a cue for her to announce in a loud voice into that silent echoing space, the accrued fine for each book. Everyone stared. (Just like being in school when your Shakespeare teacher chewed you out for handing in a term paper late.)

Yes, it has been a long time since you took a book out of the library.  Be brave. Go back and try again. You are less busy now. Electronic gadgets have been invented to remind you to return the books (  Go to the library to experience that feeling of possibility you once felt at the beginning of each school year. Trust us walk into those silent halls, cruise through the stacks, snag a prime table (no one will be there camping out for finals) and for just a moment you’ll be back at school.  Besides, there is no greater thrill (well, we can think of one) than being surrounded by books.

It’s way more satisfying than spending your day off shopping for things that cost you hard earned cash that may temporarily give you a shopping high but leave you feeling kind of empty in the morning.

Best of all for a bitch on a budget the library is free and you even get to bring their goodies home with you!